I feel an IMMENSE amount of pressure, even as a pretty secular Muslim, to defend my religion today. To defend my sisters (and brothers, but the sisters bear the burden when they wear hijab) in Islam, and to persuade my friends and my countrymen from believing what they see on the news and are being told by DAESH. Stop them from listening to psychopaths who are CLEARLY deranged, explain Islam, as if those nasty ass, dirty ass, stinky, scrubby men know ANYTHING about religion.
I feel forced to loudly recognize my religion and to proclaim my Muslimness. To make sure I behave, and people like me and then be like "Hey guys!! I'm a Muslim, you see? You don't have to hate us, we're cool"
And it's awkward.
It's awkward because, I am just a "regular" (if that means ANYTHING at all) American. I listen to rock and roll. I celebrate the 4th of July. I grew up in a trailer in a small town. I lived in Alaska for 2 years. I raved my ass off during the turn of the MILLENNIUM, literally AND figuratively. I am STILL rocking out to metal, still in love with goth and punk rock culture. I am a "bleeding heart" liberal (my Stepdad used to call me that from the age of 13 up) for the most part, and my religion is what made me so. So it's awkward to be put in the position of loudly defending your religion in public for all to see and ponder. And I am sure someone reading this will think to themselves, "well you don't have to". And while I would like to agree, how can I when I am constantly being told us "peaceful" Muslims need to speak out?
And it's awkward.
It's awkward because, I am just a "regular" (if that means ANYTHING at all) American. I listen to rock and roll. I celebrate the 4th of July. I grew up in a trailer in a small town. I lived in Alaska for 2 years. I raved my ass off during the turn of the MILLENNIUM, literally AND figuratively. I am STILL rocking out to metal, still in love with goth and punk rock culture. I am a "bleeding heart" liberal (my Stepdad used to call me that from the age of 13 up) for the most part, and my religion is what made me so. So it's awkward to be put in the position of loudly defending your religion in public for all to see and ponder. And I am sure someone reading this will think to themselves, "well you don't have to". And while I would like to agree, how can I when I am constantly being told us "peaceful" Muslims need to speak out?
People (my friends) say we need to denounce terrorism. We need to prove that Islam is not evil.We need to show them how our religion is a religion of peace, because they see on the interwebs a bunch of Quranic verses, taken out of context and thrown into a discussion, and think that is all there is to it. I would like to think my friends know me enough to know I do not support DAESH and their interpretation of Islam, and that I would not leave the Catholic church to convert to a religion that promotes violence and evil. I would like to think that who I am as a person, while not perfect, would speak for my values. Especially in the capacity DAESH unloads it. But that isn't enough. And I don't know what is going to be enough. I am asked for proof, and when I give it, I am not believed and my proposal that one can and should do their own research since I am not believed, is rejected. I am asked for explanations of verses, hadith, things people have heard or read or seen on TV, yet silenced because it's "not true" and they know more about my religion than I do. And again, refusal to do one's own research, or use resources I extend to them.
I see ugly, ignorant memes in my Facebook news feed about killing Muslims. About getting rid of the Muslims that are here, as if Muslims aren't also American. I see untrue "information" being passed around as though people have have studied this religion and are absolute experts, when the reality is that even the scholars who have spent over 20 years studying Islam don't consider themselves experts. They are STILL learning. In Islam, the seeking of knowledge never ends.
I don't want to have to discuss religion. It is emotionally and mentally taxing, its a personal thing, and it is a sensitive subject to those who are religious, and those whose chosen ideology is atheism. For some God awful reason, it comes between brothers, friends,and strangers even though the message,in the end, is the same.
But if I don't, I'm with the extremists.
If I don't, we Muslims aren't peaceful.
If I don't, I am not speaking out against the murder, rape, beheading, and crucifixion of innocent people both Christian, and the majority Muslims.
Of course I want to defend my religion. But having to defend it to the assholes that are using it to justify their violence AND to my fellow Americans is exhausting. The ignorant extremists, I get. They are ignorant, desperate, misfits of their places of origin, lonely and seeking the power of fear because they have been cast aside from their societies. They have a collective psychological problem and they are not scholars or students of religion.
But the Americans....Americans are not supposed to be ignorant. We are not supposed to be oppressive out of fear. We are not supposed to be the haters with black hearts. We are supposed to be smarter, stronger and more compassionate than that. So I do not have an excuse for my countrymen to be acting like the very people they are so afraid of.
I see ugly, ignorant memes in my Facebook news feed about killing Muslims. About getting rid of the Muslims that are here, as if Muslims aren't also American. I see untrue "information" being passed around as though people have have studied this religion and are absolute experts, when the reality is that even the scholars who have spent over 20 years studying Islam don't consider themselves experts. They are STILL learning. In Islam, the seeking of knowledge never ends.
I don't want to have to discuss religion. It is emotionally and mentally taxing, its a personal thing, and it is a sensitive subject to those who are religious, and those whose chosen ideology is atheism. For some God awful reason, it comes between brothers, friends,and strangers even though the message,in the end, is the same.
But if I don't, I'm with the extremists.
If I don't, we Muslims aren't peaceful.
If I don't, I am not speaking out against the murder, rape, beheading, and crucifixion of innocent people both Christian, and the majority Muslims.
Of course I want to defend my religion. But having to defend it to the assholes that are using it to justify their violence AND to my fellow Americans is exhausting. The ignorant extremists, I get. They are ignorant, desperate, misfits of their places of origin, lonely and seeking the power of fear because they have been cast aside from their societies. They have a collective psychological problem and they are not scholars or students of religion.
But the Americans....Americans are not supposed to be ignorant. We are not supposed to be oppressive out of fear. We are not supposed to be the haters with black hearts. We are supposed to be smarter, stronger and more compassionate than that. So I do not have an excuse for my countrymen to be acting like the very people they are so afraid of.
And so, I'm going to do my best to keep my thoughts, outbursts, answers to questions, religious discussion and EVERYTHING related, to my blog. I don't like status updates, I don't like bombarding people's news feeds with links and mini speeches and pictures. And if people give a shit about what I think or want to talk about Islam, they can come here and we can do that. But I'm not arguing about, or having deep religious conversations about religion on Facebook anymore.
I would like to leave this post with a sentiment shared by my family, my friends in the Ummah, and the Imams I have learned from:
DAESH is not of our people. Their actions and ideology goes against everything Islam and Muslims stand for. They are going AGAINST the teachings of Islam.
We do not condone or sanctify their terror.
We do not condone or sanctify violence and murder.
We are not your enemy, nor you ours.
Those men are after us AND you. And we are making it easy for them.
